You’ve got things to do. You know they matter. You might even have the time to do them.
But somehow, getting started feels incredibly difficult.
You open your laptop, then reach for your phone. You walk past the same pile of paperwork. You spend the day thinking about what you need to do, and finish it feeling frustrated with yourself.
‘Why have I wasted yet another day? And ‘why can’t I just get on with it?!’
There are several reasons you might struggle to get things done, including stress, tiredness, an overwhelming workload, or worries about getting something wrong. Understanding what’s making a task difficult gives you somewhere more useful to start than criticising yourself.
When you’re overwhelmed, starting can feel complicated
Think about what’s actually on your mind when you sit down to answer that email.
Perhaps you’re also remembering an appointment, worrying about money, planning dinner and wondering whether you’ve upset someone.
The email might be small. Everything you’re carrying alongside it might not be.
When you’re stressed, it can be harder to concentrate, make decisions and work out what to do first. A task that would usually feel straightforward can suddenly seem full of decisions: Where do I start? What matters most? What if I get it wrong?
Before pushing yourself harder, try asking: ‘What is making this difficult right now?’
You might need clearer instructions, help deciding what comes first, or a break after a demanding morning. Naming the difficulty gives you something specific to respond to.
Sometimes the task comes with uncomfortable feelings
Imagine you’ve been putting off sending an application.
You know the practical steps. But when you think about submitting it, other thoughts arrive:
‘What if I’m rejected?’
‘What if I get it and can’t cope?’
‘What if it isn’t good enough?’
If any of that sounds familiar, try noticing what feels difficult about the task. Is it the amount of work? The uncertainty? The possibility of being judged?
You don’t need to find a profound explanation for every delay. Sometimes the instructions are unclear, or the job is simply boring. But being specific about the difficulty can help you choose what to do next.
If a part of you feels worried about taking the next step, try approaching it with curiosity: ‘What am I afraid might happen?’ Give yourself a little space to understand the worry before pushing yourself to act.
Where does your own time go?
Perhaps you can respond quickly when someone else needs something, but your own plans keep slipping to the bottom of the list.
Take a look at what happened before you decided you’d ‘done nothing’.
Did you help a colleague? Listen to a friend? Sort something out for your family? Agree to another favour when your day was already full?
If this sounds familiar, it may help to ask: ‘What would I need to decline, postpone or share to make room for this?’
A fuller planner won’t create more hours in the day. Sometimes you need fewer demands and more support.
What can you try when you feel stuck?
Choose one of these as an experiment. You don’t need to turn them into another list to complete.
Make the first action clear
‘Sort out my finances’ contains lots of separate tasks.
‘Find the latest bill’ gives you a place to begin.
Choose an action small enough that you know exactly what it involves. Once you’ve done it, you can decide whether you have capacity for another.
Take a brief pause to notice what’s happening
Before trying again, look around the room. Notice a few colours or objects. If it feels comfortable, notice the support of the chair beneath you.
You might ask yourself:
- Am I tired, hungry or needing a break?
- What thoughts arrive when I picture starting?
- Would clearer instructions or someone’s help make this easier?
Give yourself permission to make a rough start
Try writing the first sentence without editing it, or making a few notes that nobody else needs to see.
If you’re worried about doing something perfectly, decide what a workable first attempt would look like.
Consider what can come off the list
You may need to renegotiate a deadline, ask someone to share a task, or make space for rest.
Your capacity matters when you’re deciding what is realistic today.
Where does somatic coaching fit in?
Somatic coaching brings attention to how you feel in your body, alongside your thoughts and emotions. When you’re finding it hard to get started, we might explore the tension, restlessness or tiredness you notice, as well as what’s going through your mind.
In our work together, we can get curious about when this happens, what feels difficult and what makes things easier. Depending on what you need, that might mean exploring boundaries, recognising when you’re asking too much of yourself, or finding a manageable way to approach something you’ve been avoiding.
We begin with your experience and work towards changes that fit your needs and everyday life.
When to seek additional support
If you’ve been unusually tired for several weeks, don’t know why, or tiredness is affecting daily life, speak with your GP. There are several possible causes worth checking.
It’s also worth seeking support if you’re struggling to cope with stress or the things you’ve tried aren’t helping. Coaching can sit alongside appropriate healthcare; it doesn’t replace assessment or treatment.
A place to start
If you’d like support exploring the patterns that keep leaving you stuck, I offer somatic coaching online.
Explore working with me and book a free discovery call to talk about what you’re finding difficult and whether my approach feels right for you.
